Portland Sea Dogs dropped the toughest hat ever however we nonetheless have questions

Minor league baseball hats are superior.

Of this, there needs to be little question. MiLB is stuffed with unimaginable hats through the years, similar to this hat for the Rocket City Trash Pandas, or this hat for the Montgomery Biscuits.

However, the Portland Sea Dogs simply upped the sport.

Portland, the Double-A affiliate of the Boston Red Sox, will rebrand because the “Maine Lobster Bakes” for a single recreation this season, approaching August twenty third.

And the hat they’re sporting for that recreation goes ABSOLUTELY HARD:

Honestly, this hat has no excuse for going as onerous because it does. Look on the lobster on there, with the menacing glare that tells anybody who dares to get close to it that they’re in for the battle of their life. What is it holding? We don’t know — extra on that in a second — however that lobster appears like they’ll beat us to loss of life with it.

“Lobster is for sure Maine’s most iconic meals merchandise…whenever you consider lobster, you consider Maine. We needed to create a theme evening that honored Maine’s most well-known delicacy and the Mainers who’ve devoted their lives to this trade that’s important to our financial system,” said Portland GM and President Geoff Lacuessa.

Still, now we have questions.

Poor little lobster
By Jared Mueller

I initially despatched this hat into the loving arms of our Slack channel to share my concern for this poor little lobster. Literally the message stated “Poor lil lobster in a pan.” Mark got here out swinging with how superior the hat was however this little face tells me he’s going off to be cooked:

Who places their mascot, regardless of how cool the precise hat is, in a pan with different substances on its solution to turn into a meal? As an Ohio State Buckeye fan, I’d put a Wolverine in a pan as a result of we’re going to cook dinner and eat our rivals.

Also, is that an ax in his hand? A hobo stick? Maybe a toothpick with a prong on the top to snack on the meals after it’s cooked?

Sweet hat, poor little lobster!

I’ve plenty of questions on this chef
By James Dator

This is an efficient hat. It’s a bit of lobster keen to battle anybody who tries to steam him to perfection. It’s horrifying. It’s cute. I get the attraction.

My challenge is with whoever is attempting to arrange this lobster. It’s clear they’ve positioned all their substances inside a sauteuse, or sauté pan as we are saying within the United States. This high-walled pan is designed to braise and roast meals in a multi-functional unit which permits direct-heat browning of substances, earlier than utilizing an oven’s oblique warmth to complete over a very long time.

The pan doesn’t even attain the lobster’s claw. What are we even attempting to do right here? There is completely no means this lobster might be cooked correctly in these circumstances. Even when you have been so as to add liquid there’s going to be drastically uneven utility of warmth in a means that neither permits the lobster to boil, or steam successfully.

This is a copper-cored pan, so clearly the chef has some cash to spend on high quality cookware. This seems to be a All-Clad copper-cored three-ply 7 quart pan, which retails for $250. You know what’s infinitely cheaper? A STOCK POT! Hell, you’ll be able to even be boujee with it and purchase a completely unnecessary All-Clad inventory pot and it’ll still only be $129.

I’m irrationally offended on the utter disrespect for high quality substances which might result in anybody placing a Maine lobster inhumanely in a sauteuse to fry a part of its physique inconsistently over warmth. You both boil a large number of water and throw it in, or discover ways to dispatch it rapidly with a knife.

This chef is a monster.

I’ve by no means bought a hat quicker
By Mark Schofield

Honestly, that claims all of it.

Thanks to the great thing about the web, inside only a few clicks I had a Lobster Bake hat of my very own heading my means.

Sure, that is in all probability a hat designed for me, in spite of everything. I’m a Red Sox fan, I grew up in New England and vacationed in Maine many a summer time, and have attended many a lobster boil.

But this can be a lobster that’s taking place swinging.

What is it holding in its claw? That we have no idea. Is it a pick-axe? A follow its belongings tied to it on the top? What belongings does a lobster even have? Is there one thing on this lobster’s previous it doesn’t wish to share with us? That stick led to many questions within the SB Nation Slack channel.

But one factor you can not query is how onerous this hat goes.

And I’ve by no means bought a hat quicker.